A few months

 I have felt overwhelmed and stretched more than I ever have in my life before during the past few months. I am trying to come to terms with the fact that I simply cannot do all the things that I want to do as a mother. Michael and I have talked at length about the fact that I need to put my own oxygen mask on first before I put on my children's, metaphorically speaking, and that is incredibly hard for me to do. The blog is a good example of a place of neglect. There's no way I can catch up sufficiently and share all the sweet memories and moments here, but I will try to include a few after a big photo dump. Sharing all the fun times makes it look like everything is always fun and lovely 'round these parts, which is certainly not true. The amount of quarreling exhausts and discourages me, as do the power struggles and my worries for the future. However, looking at these pictures does help me remember the good times, of which there are plenty.

Clara participated in her end-of-year choral concert with Spotswood Singers. She had had a panic attack at the previous concert because of the hot stole and robe, and the director, Mr. May, graciously allowed her to just wear all black instead. I was happy for her and proud of her for still participating. I am not sure what we'll do for this next year. . . 

Robbie participated in a month-long swim clinic for three days a week at Valley Fitness. He was frustrated with breaststroke but improved overall and gives it his all every time, which I really admire.

Clayton just gets cuter and cuter. 

Brotherly love (?).

Benjy showed off his art at his preschool art show.

The tables are turning where Henry's reading skills allow him to be the reader instead of an older sibling.

Michael and I enjoyed a few dates out--this Japanese restaurant makes really yummy authentic sushi. This green dragon roll is Michael's favorite.

Robbie shared his musical gifts at his most recent piano recital.

These peonies from my garden gave me such incredible joy. Audacious is the word I kept thinking of when I'd look at them--petals upon petals, opening up in such beauty.

Henry turned seven years old! He is such a fun boy to be around. 

More Clayton cuteness.

We were able to visit Nana and Bapa in Philadelphia and took the kids to the Reading Terminal market for some yummy goodies. Michael and I also went to the temple, which was great.

Me and my momma.

We had a fun visit from Bethany and Keith's family and took them up to Hawksbill Peak, the highest peak in Shenandoah. So windy!

Clara participated in a pre-FSY stake activity and actually danced at the dance (with the stake president's son, Henry Papin, what a guy). And she made it through the whole week of FSY at William and Mary College. She even texted me her testimony, which was really special. So proud of her.

Sweet times. 

Picking blueberries at Hobbit Hill Farm was another fun time. It was so fun to pick them in the shade and enjoy hearing the "kerplink kerplank kerplunk" per Blueberries for Sal.

Clayton tolerated the backpack fairly well but wasn't as enamored by the blueberries as I had anticipated. Oh well! He did love the fresh blueberry mint lemonade we enjoyed afterwards, though.

Michael took the boys to Lake Norman one weekend, and another weekend we were going to hang out with friends at Lake Gaston but it didn't work out. Instead we did an item on our bucket list--going to the climbing wall at Horizon's Edge.

Go Henry go! This was the toughest challenge.

Nice, Benjy!

Robbie kept working at this one and eventually beat the record on the wall for speed climbing it.

Happy Fourth from the boys.

This summer was full of lots of swim team. 

Henry moved up from the Junior Barracudas to the Senior Barracudas, and he and Robbie worked really hard this season. Their dives have really improved, as have their strokes.

We visited our friends, the Copelands, on their property in West Virginia and got to pet their bunnies, see their goats, and play in the river. I do wish the boys had a place like this nearby, but I'm grateful for opportunities for them to go play in nature like this.

Robbie turned double digits--10! He really wanted his own desk for his birthday, so he and Michael refinished one I got on Facebook Marketplace, and he got his own room!

Lots of pool time. Here the boys are hanging out with some friends on Robbie's birthday.

Proud of my pickles. I even grew the dill!

Clara in her pretty dress, gearing up for church.

Benjy had his first dental appointment! He was a champ and even got x-rays.

Mother's Day 2022

The family did lots of sweet things for me for Mother's Day. Clara made me a lovely blue fabric trivet in her Arts Fusion class at school. 

Daddy and the boys brought me breakfast in bed with thoughtful cards. I forgot to take a before picture, but here's the after of oatmeal, toast, and mango and pineapple slices. Yum! Michael took the boys to the Arboretum later while I had a nice conversation with my parents on the phone. We tried watching a video of Grandpa and Grandma Clayton for a bit, but the older boys were being pills.

This cute boy's presence in our home makes being a mother extra sweet. His legs have gotten so much chunkier now that he is eating solids.

Being a mom humbles me, exhausts me, exhilarates me, inspires me, and teaches me so many things. I am learning (not often successfully, but sometimes) how to persuade in Christlike ways without control. I am learning the importance of listening and being patient. I am learning the power of love in how it can inspire the best in a person. I personally have felt that love from both my Father in Heaven and from loved ones in my own life, particularly from my parents and from Michael. When I've struggled to love one of my children when he/she is acting especially unlovable, I have prayed sincerely to be filled with love and have mercifully received it, greater than my own capacity. I am making lists of moments when each of my children are particularly lovable so that I can look back on those moments as evidence of their true nature when they're being a stinker.

Even though I wish I could influence lots of people at one time, I do recognize the power of a mother in influencing her children and the impact that can have through generations. Being a mother also helps me see that God sees the big picture and that I can be happier if I do, too. 

Spew or Swallow: A poem

 I wrote this poem recently inspired by Revelation 3:16 and thought I'd include it here in all its glory, haha:

Spew or Swallow?

Tasteless and tepid

Timid and tame

These are flavors

I never want to be named.

Bright and bold

Fiery and strong

Are flavors to savor

I want to show I belong.

Oh to be swallowed up

My strong will and all

And not be spewed out 'cuz

I had no taste at all.

That's my hope, that I can truly be "all in" in the gospel, even when I'm tempted to just wade in the water because it's more work to swim upstream against the world's currents. But I have faith we can all do it with the Savior's help.

Easter and fun with Uncle David

We had a lovely Easter weekend. Bethany and Keith and their family came to visit, and we drove up to DC to pick up David after taking the kids to the National Zoo. 

Nobody at church could tell these three were siblings. 😜

Clayton looked so spiffy in his Easter duds.

David misses his own kids while he's away, so we were the lucky recipients of his extra attention and help. He even mowed the lawn for Michael. 

This year I told the kids that they weren't getting Easter eggs (because last year a couple of the kids had been turds about not getting enough eggs), this year they hunted for their traditional chocolate bunnies and something different--a butterfly kit. We got a cup of five caterpillars. Hopefully they'll turn into butterflies--they're currently chrysalides. Honestly they gross me out (I even had a dream about them last night--that a tarantula was in the net eating them), but hopefully the end result will be worth it. 

Hunting.

Benjy was disappointed in the overall lack of candy. That face. 😘

Dying eggs.

Cousin Frederick (age 3) was so cute with Clayton!

Easter eve devotional after we enjoyed our traditional meatloaf, mashed potatoes, green beans, resurrection rolls, and carrot cake. (We had Easter dinner on Saturday evening because everyone had to leave after lunch on Sunday.) The weather was so lovely and it was a beautiful day spent as a family.

Then we were extra blessed because Char came into town to visit David briefly, and we met up with them halfway in a cute town called Front Royal. We ate some delicious Asian (they had a variety of cuisines) food at a restaurant there and then got ice cream. It felt like old times in Provo when we were newlyweds.

They are just the best.

 Char is one of my heroes! She is getting ready for their trip to Madagascar this summer for three years. I hope we can go visit them.

Gatlinburg adventure

We had a fun family adventure down to Gatlinburg, TN this past month. Here are a few highlights:

The older boys and Daddy rode a mountain coaster through the trees at a place called "Goats on the Roof." 

While Daddy was waiting in line for tickets, we mined for gems. It was amazing how such large gems were found amidst sand and tiny pebbles. ;-)

I am deeply grateful for sweet moments like this between siblings. Too rare, but still precious. 

We enjoyed an evening at the Island at Pigeon Forge, and it was a win that our whole family went up in the large ferris wheel. Each gondola was enclosed and fit eight people. The view from the top!

We also splurged and paid for the boys do to these fun trampolines. They were pretty expert jumpers and flippers from all their practice on our own tramp. 

Robbie could go forward and then backward right in a row. 

Benjy couldn't go super high but he sure enjoyed being included.

In Dollywood, Benjy got to ride some of the younger rides. He just informed me, "I don't like to be on the duckies. The duckies aren't fun." He was a good sport, but it was tough on this trip since I had Clayton and he couldn't do all the things he wanted to while Daddy went on bigger rides with Robbie and Henry.

I don't know how Clara felt about this trip, but she enjoyed watching K-pop groups and a K-drama while we took the boys to Dollywood for two of the days.

Check out this small man that we saw at Ripley's Believe It or Not. 

Even though we didn't have our traditional St. Patrick's day traditions at home, all the kids dressed in green. We went to the Ripley's Aquarium, where we saw different sharks, cute penguins, an octopus, and jellies, in addition to lots of fish.

Check out this giant chicken (Cornish game hen?) Benjy had to eat at Dolly Parton's Stampede!

The show was really well done and everyone (except maybe Clayton) enjoyed it. 

More Gatlinburg fun.

Clara in the eye of a needle.

Future astronaut.

We were pretty pooped with Clayton sleeping in our room and waking up a couple of times a night. Daddy also had to catch up on work at night, so he enjoyed a few minutes of rest in the play place at Dollywood when it was raining.

A favorite ride for Benjy in Dollywood was this cute Bear trail one. He was so big to go by himself!

The trip was fun and tiring. Benjy just asked me, "Why can't we go to the wooden house [the cabin]? When can we go there again?" That's a good sign that it was worth it.

Life lately

Winter is holding on but spring is pushing through.  Daffodils are so happy (wish I had some at my house--maybe I'll plant some in the fall). Here are few things happening 'round these parts of late.

Benjy caught a stomach bug, and then two weeks later we all got Covid. It took about two weeks to get energy back up. The kids bounced back pretty quickly, but I am so glad we didn't have the earlier delta variant. A wonderful man (mid-fifties age) in our ward, Jeff Huffman, passed away from Covid-pneumonia in February, which rocked our ward and definitely gives me greater empathy for so many who have lost loved ones.

Henry and I had a date at a do-your-own pottery place. Here he is painting his pencil cup before it was fired.

For Valentine's day, Michael hid these Riesens around the house, giving me ten reasons why he loves me. They made me feel so loved. Despite having Covid that week, we managed to make our heart-shaped pizza still.

Seven months old and a smile that lights up the room!

Robbie made us this thoughtful Valentine's Day card. 

I love how it rotates on the brad--so creative.

Henry made us these sweet cards as well, all on his own. These boys know how to help us feel loved.

Henry is growing more confident in his reading. Here he is starting off with required reading in the Dunford+Weiler household.

Sunday naps. It's a sweet day when they all coincide. (Not this day, unfortunately.)

Clayton was not interested in solids, at least any purees, for the first few weeks of my attempts, but he is getting much better and particularly likes them in the squeezer pouch form where he doesn't have to get dirty. But this photo above  (eating prunes) shows that he is getting better at that too. He loves eating little teeny pieces of chicken and sucking on pizza crusts. Applesauce is very tart to him, but he'll eat it with other fruits or veggies.

We took the family up to visit Nana and Bapa and watched the kids while Michael and I did a sealing session in the temple. It was a sweet time in the temple, especially because we got to be in a session with Ruth and Lee Robertson and President and Staci England Schill. The sealer spoke with us afterwards, teaching us, and we felt the Spirit.

We enjoyed a visit to the Franklin Institute--here the boys are climbing on an artery.

I am so glad my kids can meet their grandparents--I hope they remember these sweet times.