Present at Christmas

 Growing up, my parents did a wonderful job of making Christmas special. As the youngest, I was the beneficiary of years of traditions in the making, so I participated as St. Lucia bringing cinnamon rolls and hot chocolate while singing and wearing a white nightgown with a wreath of candles on my head, in the Christmas Eve buffet, in caroling, in the reading of Luke 2 on Christmas Eve, and on Christmas day in lining up on the stairs, opening stockings on Mom and Dad's bed (after waiting "forever"), and in opening presents one at a time, all as a matter of course. I realize now that these precious memories and traditions didn't come accidentally but were intentionally repeated each year to cement in our minds that Christmas was an important time, that we were valued, and that our family was a place of love and service.

For me and my now-complete family, I try each year to make Christmas a time to focus on the Savior and I try so hard to get my shopping done in November so I can focus on the reason for the season and be present with my children. I write a list of which three presents we will be giving to each of our children, what their stockings will be, what the elves will bring on Christmas Eve, who we will be giving to for our secret service, who to carol to, etc. etc. My prayer for Christmas this year was that I would not get sucked into the buying buying buying and all the distractions that I find myself enchanted by. Did I succeed this year? Well, I unfortunately did not succeed in completing all my buying in November. I definitely got very distracted by the neverending to do list, and there were many times when I could have put my phone down more and given my children more face time. There was also still lots of quarreling and bickering, with some sibling rivalries more concerning to me than others, mingled with fears and worries for the future.

However, there were also many sweet moments intermingled with the hustle and bustle of the month:

• The children's undeniable excitement as they changed our advent countdown blocks each day to Christmas (Clara trying to move it ahead a day beforehand in her eagerness)
• Stuffing ourselves into the minivan in the rain to go carol to Robbie's piano teacher, Henry's drum teacher, and drop off a poinsettia at an older brother's home from church (Jerry Wright) and singing Christmas carols in the car on the way
• Seeing the sweet acts of service the children performed for each other to fill hay in the manger
• Watching their eagerness as they turned the Christmas countdown blocks each day, Clara always eager to turn it a day or two early
• Decorating gingerbread houses and Christmas cookies (accompanied by some "drama" and behavioral noise, as usual, but that's okay)
• The kids eager to choose items from the Church World Service catalog to donate to others
• The boys making little love gifts for each other for Christmas Eve
• Feeling the Spirit as we sat in the living room on a blanket eating our "Joseph and Mary dinner" of fish, dried fruit, pistachios, cheese, and naan
• Feeling deep gratitude that Char and her daughter Abby were able to join us this Christmas when I was feeling lonely that we weren't having any visitors--Abby's sweet presence made such a difference in changing the dynamic with our boys
• The kids willing to help purchase things for our "Gadianton Givers" family (Secret Santa)
• Clayton's look of wonder at seeing "Christmas yights!" (lights) and pointing out "Christmas!" when we see the Christmas trees in Costco
• Benjy doing a stellar job as a narrator in his preschool Christmas program and singing out sweetly and confidently
• Robbie's acing his piano recital, his school holiday concert, and coming in first runner up in his school spelling bee
• Taking Robbie out to Five Guys to celebrate his memorizing the YM priesthood theme in preparation for his receiving the priesthood in January
• Michael riding bikes with Henry in Hillandale Park for their date and Henry's reluctance turning into satisfaction as they rode hard trails and got mud on their tires
• Clara's joy on stage as she danced in her Christmas recital
• The surprising "coincidence" that we had purchased a balloon-making kit for Henry for Christmas when unbeknownst to us Char came with her own balloons and skills to teach him
• Gratitude that despite the pink eye that is currently plaguing me (passed on from Benjy), that we didn't have to cancel any of our Christmas plans due to sickness
• Fun memories of hanging out with the Zopps at the lake house despite their flat tire and the absolutely insane crowds at Busch Gardens Christmas Town (Michael and I agree that we will not attempt amusement parks for a long time)

I don't know what my children will remember from Christmas, but I do know that Jesus lives and that He loves me despite my focus on worldly distractions at times during this season. 

Lessons we can still learn:

- It is better to give than to receive

- It doesn't matter if the person you served notices it or not--the Lord sees and is grateful

- Christmas is about Jesus, not about presents

- Comparing is the thief of joy

Thanksgiving, Michael's birthday!

Not sure how it happened, but Michael turned 45. Forty-five! I am not sure how we're getting older, but somehow it happens and it's quite weird.

Michael wanted a low-key birthday, so we ordered Vito's for dinner (he didn't want me to have to cook because we'd been prepping all day for Thanksgiving the next day--what a thoughtful guy) and I made my mom's recipe of ice cream crunch cake for dessert, a family favorite.

 The boys made him some very sweet cards. 

I hope some day they'll realize how blessed they are to have Michael as their dad.

This Thanksgiving wasn't my most favorite, I confess. We had chosen not to travel over the break, so we asked around for people who didn't have a place to go for Thanksgiving. We were going to have four guests (including the missionaries), but then we had to uninvite everyone because Clayton threw up three times the day before Thanksgiving and I was afraid it would spread. However, we did manage to have a fun time playing kickball at Rockingham Park with a couple of other ward families on Thanksgiving day. And I was glad we had uninvited them because then at the lake house the following night Benjy threw up five or six times through the night, and then I was sick all day on Saturday. However, miraculously, no one else got sick! That was truly a blessing. And the weather at the lake was beautiful--the boys went out on the water for a little bit too despite the chilliness.

Before the sickness set in, the kids signed up for what they were going to help with, and it was really fun to have their help in the kitchen. Having them all helping me was definitely a highlight of the holiday.

Clayton really wanted to help Benjy with the chopping. 

It was weird just having our family but we still enjoyed lots of yummy food!

Since Michael doesn't like turkey and the kids don't really care, we enjoyed a rotisserie chicken and seasoned drumsticks (not as good as I was hoping) from Costco. I had still planned on making a turkey breast in the slow cooker but put that away once we decided we'd not have any guests.

And of course Benjy got to participate in his preschool Thanksgiving program. One of my favorite songs they sing to the tune of Frere Jacques "Mr. Turkey, Mr. Turkey, run away! Run away! If you are not careful, you will be a mouthful, Thanksgiving day. Thanksgiving day." Lol.

 A highlight of the month was leading a joint ward choir from Harrisonburg in the Harrisonburg-Rockingham Interfaith Association Thankfulness event, where other faiths--Unitarian Universalist, Methodist, Jewish, Muslim, Ushindi, and more--shared music, dance, or other presentations. We sang "Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing" and the choir worked hard in advance and did an amazing job. It was held at the Asbury United Methodist Church downtown and I think everyone felt uplifted and unified by our common humanity and desires to see good in all things.

One day Clayton and I were on the trampoline and I happened to have my cell phone in my pocket. I had to snap a pic of this sweet boy on my knees playing "motorcycle" and "rocketship" with the blue sky behind him. I always want to remember the joy and preciousness of these fleeting days with him and each of our children as they grow older.

I'm experimenting with growing garlic this winter. We'll see how it goes!