Intentional

Last week we watched some of my family's old video footage from when me and my siblings were young. I know that family movies tend to capture only the good times, but I was sat in amazement as I realized how much my parents did for us. Did with us. My parents did things with an end goal in mind--good kids and an eternal family--so they did things with intention. They didn't just let the days pass by and wait for that magical day when we would have plenty of time for fun family activities, or when we would suddenly have money to do big vacations, or the day when we would make our own family orchestra. With seven children, financial resources were always all accounted for well before everything that we kids wanted could be had. Different personalities meant that probably there was always someone who was ticked off at somebody else. There was never enough time. There was always something else to pull attention away from the family. Teaching and encouraging us to be capable, hard-working, creative, and obedient to them and the Lord while also nurturing our individual personalities was no doubt an incredible challenge (I just have two and feel overwhelmed at times), but they moved forward with purpose and intention without waiting for the elusive perfect time or day to appear.

Just a random pic from a recent drive in the Shenandoah Mountains.

We've made family plans/goals a couple of times now but haven't been very good about following up on them and making sure those goals are in the forefront of our minds when we decide to do something. Is an activity going to bring us closer to or further from our goals? Is my spending time on the Internet--stalking recipe blogs or catching up on Facebook or trying to find that pair of jeans that will fit me in my weird post-pregnancy body--helping me become the person I want to become? When I compare myself or my situation or my children to others, am I empowering us to reach our full potential, or am I dragging us down? Sometimes I forget that I will be judged by how I use my time, and that the better I use my time, the more peace I will feel (e.g. when I make dinner in the morning, I am always happier and calmer in the busy evening, but how often do I successfully do I do it?). God has a plan for each of His children to return to Him again. Do I have a plan for how I am going to fulfill my stewardship as a daughter, wife, mother, and woman and follow His plan? Or is life going to pass me by while my mind is occupied by the things that matter least in the long run?

In other news, I took Clara to get her hair cut at a hair place last week for the first time. She was nervoua and told me she didn't want to and almost started crying while we were there. However, a tender mercy appeared in the form of a school secretary who was getting her hair cut right before us, and she encouraged Clara and helped her feel better. The hair stylist, Robin, was an angel and Clara did so well, sitting up tall in the chair, even letting Robin keep the clip in her hair when she really wanted it to come out. I was quite proud of her. I felt so, well, normal, having a typical mother-daughter experience. It was great.

She loved her swing bob haircut, especially after Robin straightened it with an iron.

But of course, after washing (and after just sleeping on it) it bounced right back up with even more wave than before. So now I'm debating on whether to straighten her hair every few days to make it more manageable. Don't you just love seeing your own vanity reflected in your efforts to make your kids look good?

Anyway, just Friday thoughts.

Birthday re-cap

I wanted to quickly post a few pics from my birthday while Robbie's asleep and before Clara gets off the bus.

Michael took the day off and I told him I wanted to go on a hike in the Shenandoah Mountains that morning. So after getting Clara on the bus, we drove up to the South River Falls trail and had a lovely time.

 At the falls--don't you love the self-timer?

Robbie was a trooper in the Ergo. He was also a nice little sweaty furnace for his papa.

That evening Michael made me a fabulous brownie cake. I am glad there weren't thirty candles because the heat from the ones we had was enough to singe my eyebrows off.

Another classic self-timer shot. Unfortunately Robbie was asleep and Hyrum was at a friend's house.

And in other news, this kid just keeps getting cuter and cuter. He has rolled over several times and is only ten weeks. Michael's mom told me that Michael started walking at nine months . . . oh dear.

Conversations with Clara

CLARA: Last night I had a bad dream.
MICHAEL: What did you dream about?
CLARA: I dreamed that I killed Ursula.
MICHAEL: How'd you kill her?
CLARA: With a battle droid.

CLARA: I want to wear my tutu to school.
ME: You can't wear your tutu to school, but maybe I could show Ms. Parks some pictures of you in your tutu.
CLARA: I'm ignoring your suggestion.

CLARA: (while eating beef stew) This looks like (and then proceeds to finger-spell P-O-O-E). (poop-ee)
ME: (laughing)

CLARA: For Halloween, can you be Mary, and Daddy can be Joseph . . . and Hyrum can be a donkey?
ME: (laughing)
CLARA: It's NOT a joke. I am serious. 

CLARA: Terrorists flew a plane into the twin towers.
ME: (amazed) Um, yeah, that's right.
CLARA: And the fourth plane flew into, uh, the Pentagon.
ME: How did you learn that?
CLARA: Ms. Sager. (her music teacher)
ME: Why was she telling you about that?
CLARA: We are learning patriotic songs.

MICHAEL: That is the bomb. (I can't remember what he was referring to.)
CLARA: I hate bombs!
ME: No, Clara, "the bomb" means that something is very cool. It's just an expression.
CLARA: (in a whisper to me) He likes bombs. I don't!

CLARA: (after I poured her a glass of milk) Is this breastmilk?
ME: Uh, no . . . it's just regular milk.
CLARA: Well, it looks yellow.

Thirty Happy Things

Today I turn thirty years old. It's been a wonderful day. While it seems that some dread this day, I have looked forward to it for a long time. For some reason I have no problem getting older--I think it might be because as the youngest of seven children, I always wanted to be older and somehow "catch up" to my older siblings. Most of my friends are older than I am as well, for some reason.

I feel very happy today. I thought I'd make a list of thirty things that make me happy, in no particular order.

1. Going to bed by 9:30.
2. Hearing the dishwasher running and leaving the kitchen with clean counters and a shiny sink before going to bed.
3. When Clara says, "Ro-bbie! Don't do that!" in a funny baby-ish voice whenever he squirts in his diaper or spits out his pacifier.
4. Robbie's amazing smiles.
5. Giving Clara a massage with apricot oil while listening to quiet music, something we did sometimes when she was a toddler and which she has asked to do again recently.
6.  Michael's laugh.
7. Feeling prepared for Cub Scouts and ward choir.
8. Feeling caught up at work.
9. Listening to beautiful music.
10. Watching Cranford with Michael.
11. Seeing Clara get off the bus in the afternoons.
12. Finishing a good workout with lots of stretching.
13. A book that makes me look forward to each moment I have to spare.
14. Huge green salads with lots of stuff in them and a good dressing.
15. Breyers Vanilla Bean ice cream and chewy brownies.
16. Finding a shirt that doesn't cling to me in the wrong places.
17. A good supportive bra.
18. Getting to church early enough to sit and prepare for the Sacrament.
19. Preparing dinner in the morning so the evening isn't stressful.
20. When Clara gets her morning routine done in a timely manner.
21. My Keen sandals.
22. Freshly trimmed nails and plucked eyebrows.
23. Reading to and with Clara.
24. A cleaned refrigerator.
25. The happy feeling I get the morning after if I resist overeating the evening before.
26. Taking slow, deep breaths when I realize how shallowly I've been breathing.
27. Good hair days.
28. Inspiring scripture study sessions.
29. Doing work as a family.
30. Robbie and Clara after their baths.

I could just keep going and going. So many good things. The other day I was feeling very discouraged. I made two lists: a "Crappy Things" column and a "Blessings"
 column. There was no contest. Even when I feel like the crappy things are very heavy (mostly involving concerns about Clara's schooling, her social skills, independence, the future, etc.), the blessings shrink those mountains down to teeny little ant hills, which I could easily destroy with some Amdro (aka faith, gratitude, and an eternal perspective).

Here's to another thirty years and more!

Then and now

Robbie and Clara aren't the only ones growing up around here.

Hyrum and Clara, 2005.

 

Hyrum and Robbie, 2012.