Wasted Cereal: a poem by Brittany Weiler

O wasted cereal

The bane of my life

Seeing you floating

Is a stab like a knife.

Beautiful Cheerios

Divine Oatmeal Squares

Piles of Mini-Wheats

Bloat without care.

Dollar signs flash

As I pour down the drain

The food that my children

Have left without shame.

The leftover scraps

I've been guilty of eating

But my heart's still unhappy

And the pleasure is fleeting.

And so my dear friends,

The food I adore,

I am sorry you've been wasted;

You'll be wasted no more.

While you won't be appearing

On my menu so often

In my heart you are near

Never ever forgotten.

When my tummy is needy

And the children aren't nigh,

To the pantry I'll sneak

On you I can rely. 

Reindeer Run!

Every December, Robbie's preschool hosts a "fun run" to raise money for extra expenditures. Robbie was pumped.

 Okay, he was more like, "What are we doing here?" Dressed up in snow boots (it has been rainy and cold, two t-shirts, a pullover, a coat, and his Reindeer Run shirt--oh, and let's not forget his antlers--Robbie was ready to go.

Robbie was a speedy runner (no surprise) and was the fastest in his class (not the overall race, though--there were a few in front of him). Not that it was a race, but he just can't help but run quickly. Here he is so far ahead of the pack that he wasn't sure which way to go.

 All done!

 He was tired afterwards, but it was nothing that a little hot cocoa, a reindeer cupcake, and a cookie couldn't fix.

Henry at eighteen months

Wow, Henry is now a year and a half. Awesome! He just gets busier, smarter, and funnier. He really does seem to enjoy things when they're funny and can tell when he's funny. He loves laughing with Robbie. He also loves teasing Robbie by taking things away or getting in his space or wrecking his creations, giggling while doing so. But they also have fun running around and laughing together. Tonight Robbie read Henry a book, which was quite sweet.

He points and does a lot of grunting to get what he wants--he does say "wawa" (water), "doggy," "no," "bye-bye," "nigh-nigh" (night-night), "bah" (ball), "swee" (swing), "booby" (blueberry), "poopy," etc. He is tolerating his glasses better--I just wish we could get some with 180-degree vision. His lack of good peripheral vision means he runs into things sometimes. Poor kid.

Henry enjoys looking at books and loves pulling things down (like ribbon on the Christmas tree), out (like the basket of potatoes in the pantry), and apart (like marker tops and sucking on the markers). He also likes climbing, going down the slide on his tummy backwards, and jumping on the trampoline while I hold his hands or hold him and jump.

Henry has had a cold for the past nearly two weeks, and the wheezing has persisted (he has had several other episodes since birth but not for about six months). He now tolerates his breathing treatments thanks to watching Baby Einstein. He will drag the nebulizer over to me in the kitchen because he wants to watch it. Hope he gets better soon and outgrows it.

Henry is pretty good on errands and especially loves the samples at Costco. I watched our neighbor's son, Luke, one morning while we went.

 Playing at the park with Daddy (and Grandpa) is the best.

 Henry loves to climb on stools and either get onto the counter (which he does all.the.time) or just snitch food that he finds there.

Who, me?

Good thing you're so cute, kiddo.

Being the chosen one: the quest for purpose and belonging

The chosen one. The special. The one who will break the spell.

Warner Bros/Buzzfeed

The theme of "the chosen one" is a common thread in storytelling: The Lord of the Rings trilogy, Star Wars, Harry Potter, Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, the Lego movie, and certainly the Bible, among many others, all tell the story about an individual having a unique mission, of someone being set apart for an important purpose.

I have been thinking about this a lot recently. I can't speak for everyone, but I believe that there is part of each of us that desires to be that chosen one, the favorite, the one who is most loved, most cherished, the one and only. Who didn't feel envious of their siblings when they felt they were getting more attention? Who didn't want the teacher to like his or her paper the best or to get the highest grade? Who didn't want to read his or her patriarchal blessing for the first time and secretly hope that there would be information about a important mission contained therein?


                                          

In the excellent book, Siblings Without Rivalry, by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish, the authors share this thought:

To be loved equally is somehow to be loved less. To be loved uniquely--for one's own special self--is to be loved as much as we need to be loved. (p. 71)

That is what children--each of us--want: to be loved for ourselves, not the same as someone else or even in relation to someone else. And while the book is referring to siblings within a family, in a real sense, we as humans are all experiencing sibling rivalry on earth all the time. As spirit children of Heavenly Father and Mother, we are brothers and sisters, competing (often without realizing it) to be the best, to have the most, to be better or smarter or prettier or funnier or wealthier or more intelligent, even more righteous.

My parents have done a great job in helping me feel loved for who I am, despite my being the youngest below six very talented siblings.

 It's painful to admit, but I have subconsciously gauged my ranking in the sight of God based on the behavior of those around me, hoping that I'm more obedient or better than the person next to me and therefore more worthy of His love and blessings.

The inherent drive that I feel for belonging, for feeling needed, important, powerful, cherished: This drive can either lead me horizontally--looking to other people for acceptance, or vertically--looking to God for approval and belonging. When I look to others, I either feel falsely proud (at least I'm not doing that on Sunday) or inaccurately shamed (I am never going to be able to be as good a mom as she is). When I seek God's acceptance, however, I realize something.

I am chosen. I am loved. I am needed.

lds.org

Heavenly Father has always been about the individual. His work to bring us back to Him is not in general terms--it is to bring each one of us back, individually. President Howard W. Hunter said, "I have always been impressed that the Lord deals with us personally, individually." I love the parable of the lost sheep--the Savior cares about the one. While Jesus Christ is His Only Begotten, He doesn't love us less--in fact, He was willing to sacrifice His Chosen One in order to save each of us, each of His children. And not only that, but He has chosen us to help Him in that work.

lds.org

While Jesus Christ did teach groups of people, the majority of his miracles were for individuals. When He appeared to the Nephites in the Americas after His resurrection, it is recorded that "the multitude went forth, and thrust their hands into his side, and did feel the prints of the nails in his hands and in his feet; and this they did do, going forth one by one until they had all gone forth" (3 Nephi 11:15).

Another favorite scripture is when Jesus Christ appeared personally to the brother of Jared. Ether records, "And he (Jesus Christ) ministered unto him even as he ministered unto the Nephites; and all this, that this man might know that he was God, because of the many great works which the Lord had showed unto him" (Ether 3:18, emphasis added). All this. Just for one man to know that God loved him.

I bear my testimony that we are each loved uniquely by a Father in Heaven who can somehow make us each feel like His favorite. The Savior told His apostles in John 15:16, "Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you." While not ordained to the holy apostleship, each of us is "the chosen one," because we are the only one like ourselves and have been chosen for a purpose that only we can fulfill. We might feel small and insignificant, overshadowed by those who are more capable or talented. But like the puzzle of a thousand pieces, even if one piece is missing, the puzzle is incomplete. No one else can take my place because they are needed where they are in the puzzle.

http://lego.wikia.com/wiki/Emmet

                                          

I feel so happy to be able to say along with Emmet, "I am the special!" And so are you.

Thanksgiving 2016

This year, we decided to make the trek down to Georgia for Thanksgiving. Although my parents are gone on their mission to SLC, it was fun getting to see the Weilers and a couple of my siblings as well. The drive down went well (until about the last hour and a half when Henry was done being in the car, but even with that it wasn't bad).

After having a great time spending the night with the Gertsch's, we headed to Lilburn to Michael's parents' home, dropped the kids off, and then drove to the temple in Atlanta with some of his siblings. It was so fun and special to be with them--pictured is Tabitha, L'Anita, and Seth and Marissa in the back.

Being together with family in the house of the Lord is truly a choice experience. (We also enjoyed a brief Costco and Atlanta traffic adventure afterwards.)

 Michael's parents live close to several parks, and we had made sure to visit a couple. This swing was so fun.

Michael also got to play golf with his dad and Robbie--definitely a much-appreciated birthday treat.

On Thanksgiving day, we joined the Weilers for their yearly tradition of hiking the five-mile trail around Stone Mountain. Robbie and Henry were such troopers--Robbie hiked almost the whole way without being held, and Henry was happy for much of the time in the backpack. Wish I had gotten a group shot, but here are a couple of pics. Clara had some stomach troubles and hung out with Seth and Melody (who were sick with a yucky cold) at home. I know she was happy getting to watch The Parent Trap!

 Taking a quick break by the lake.



That afternoon, we enjoyed our feast at the church building near Michael's parents' home. Everyone brought lots of deliciousness, including a bucket of fried chicken from Bojangles that Michael had been craving. Look at cute baby Andrew! (And Henry's pretty cute, too. Sorry about the bad pic, sweetheart!)

 One end of the table.

 The other end.

Look at all those cute cousins ravenous for the desserts!

On Friday, we drove to my brother Clay's house to spend some time with them. I have always loved being with their sweet family--they make you feel so welcome and loved. Amie and I enjoyed a quick jaunt to Publix and I had fun chatting with her as she prepared a delicious beef stew for dinner as well. Robbie enjoyed their Legos and electronics, and everyone adored Henry and couldn't get over the fact how much he looks like Bapa.

 Clara with cousins Faith and Lia enjoyed some Mario Kart and screen time.

 Tried to capture this funny shot of Henry who had climbed under their tree to feast on some ornaments. Fortunately no harm was done. (I think.)

Here I am with Clay and Matt. Matt and his wife Tana took the time to drop by on their way to see some of Tana's family, and Tana was such a trooper recovering from neck surgery on a couple of weeks previous.

We headed home that evening (Michael and his amazing car-driving stamina got us there by 1:30am), and it was so nice to have all of Saturday to get things back in order again.

I sure love my family. They are one of the best things for which I give thanks. Happy Thanksgiving!

Michael's burfday

The man of the house keeps getting older (funny how the lady of the house doesn't, haha) . . . thirty-eight and he just gets more handsome and continues to be the kind, fun, hardworking man that I fell in love with.

Waffles are his favorite, and I didn't even put in any wheat flour or change the recipe. As Maui from the movie "Moana" would say, "You're welcome."

 I made my mom's delicious lasagna for dinner and we had brownies and ice cream for dessert.

 The kids had fun hiding their presents and giving clues to help him instead of doing hot and cold this year (Robbie had a hard time resisting the urge to just tell him straight out and felt embarrassed when I scolded him, which I felt bad about). Here Robbie's doing the requisite ritual of "heavy, heavy hangover."

 We sure love Daddy!!

We actually celebrated his birthday on the 21st since we were traveling down to Georgia that night. However, we enjoyed a delicious dinner that night with our friends, the Gertsch family, on his official birthday.

Can't wait to spend the next million birthdays with you.

Halloween fun!

We enjoyed several Halloween festivities this year, carving pumpkins, choosing costumes, going to the church Halloween activity, and enjoying lots of candy. Clara wanted to attend the school Halloween dance, and I suggested that we invite a few friends over to our house and have our own party. She agreed and helped send out invitations.

 Let's be honest--I decorated for me--the guests probably wouldn't have cared too much. Planning a Halloween party for a girl with autism (and a couple of her guests also had special needs) was different than a usual Halloween party might be--Clara nixed the bobbing for worms in whipped cream and bobbing for apples or feel creepy body parts (like spaghetti, etc.).

 However, donuts on a string were a hit, and the scavenger hunt (thanks, Pinterest) was a lot of fun.

 Eating lots of yummy food is always a sure winner, and the girls had fun listening and dancing to music, too. Hair chalk of various colors was applied to all the ladies' hair (and Robbie's, too), which was Clara's number one request for the party.

I feel like she had more fun than she would have at the school dance with lots of loud music and potentially overwhelming sensory experiences.

For Halloween, Clara was a baby, Robbie was Superman, and Henry was a pilot.

Clara loved using Henry's pacifier, Robbie loved showing off his muscles with a grimace, and Henry was happy to wear his aviator hat, which was just about the cutest thing ever.

It was a good year, although I ran out of candy for trick-or-treaters by 7pm. Oops! Will have to buy more next year. Robbie already told me he was going to be Batman next year. We'll see.

Apple picking

Our friends, the Lansings, invited us to go to Carter Mountain Orchard to pick apples with them. Despite being rainy that day and Michael being in Boston (for a conference), we made the trip over the mountain and were so glad we did.

Henry was really happy to take this picture.

 Cute worms.

 Everyone busy with their own bags of apples. Henry was unfazed by the slippery grass and steep slope--he just kept picking himself back up again.

 That's a good one up there, Mom! Can you reach it for me?

 Checking out the rainbow.

 Ooh, this is a tough one, but I'm going to get it!

Happy kids.

We had fun going out for pizza in downtown Charlottesville afterward, despite busy traffic. It was great being with such wonderful people and having a good time. It's crazier the more kids we have, but I'm glad we don't let our children prevent us from getting together--it just adds to the fun.

Now I need to get moving on using up a ton of granny smith apples!

Fall getaway

Michael's parents (Grandma and Grandpa) came up last week for a visit. It was wonderful to have them, as always. Michael took them up to Pennsylvania for a night to visit Philadelphia, attend the temple, and see some of the places where his dad grew up. They had a great time. (See previous post for more details.)

The day after they returned, Michael and I left the kids with Grandma and Grandpa and drove down to the Fort Lewis Lodge, which is about one and a half hours away from Harrisonburg.

The fort from the 1700s no longer exists, but the current owners have made the lodge, barn, cabins, etc. into a bed and breakfast. The wife makes breakfast and dinner for all those staying there (about 50 people?), and it is always delicious.

 We stayed there for a night five years ago (Hyrum babysat Clara at home), and we were looking forward to returning. This time, we stayed in the silo. It was awesome--we were on the third floor, and our room was round (actually it had 12 sides, a dodecagon, I just learned).

 With the great weather, we enjoyed a lot of time outdoors. We went on a hike on Friday morning on Hickory Gap Trail, a view that overlooks the lodge and surrounding property.

 Michael found me a great walking stick, but then had a hard time finding one that worked for him. This one was almost a good fit . . .

In the afternoon, we drove an hour south to Lake Moomaw, a huge lake that was virtually empty. It was really fun to go canoeing--I hadn't done that in a long time. My muscles were sore the next morning. We also met a woman who was a less-active member of the Church there--that was special.

 Gorgeous scenery.

Back at the lodge, we enjoyed the grounds and played some disc golf and ping pong. I am terrible at disc golf but had fun anyway. Michael, who plays any sport better than I do, was encouraging and never made me feel bad but helped me fish my frisbee out of the "shtuff" (the tall weeds and brush into which I apparently loved to throw it).

 Resting on the hammock was awesome--another experience I hadn't had in years. It was so peaceful looking up at the leaves, hearing the birds, feeling the breeze, just talking together and enjoying each other's company. We commented on how a photo just doesn't capture these experiences well--you have to enjoy them with all of your senses.

My handsome hiking companion. I just feel so immeasurably blessed to have such a great friend as my husband. We make a good team and feel renewed when we enjoy time away on our own. It is always reassuring that we still like hanging out together--we know when the kids are gone we'll be just fine.

We sure missed the kids, though, and were happy to head back on Saturday afternoon. Thanks so much again to Grandma and Grandpa for watching the kids--it is not an easy job, that is for sure.