An Ode to the Roach

I was going through my blog drafts and found this poem on roaches that I never published. It made me smile and reminded me of our time in Augusta, Georgia (when I wrote this poem) during dental school. There were sooo many roaches. I loved our time there, but I sure am grateful that I live in a place where roaches aren't so commonplace.

An Ode to the Roach

I want to thank you, Mr. Roach,
for making life so great
because of you, my reaction time
is becoming quite first-rate.

If for some reason I'm outside
When it's late at night
My eyes have grown roach-vision
And I sense you without light.

I'm glad that you're around, dear roach,
'cuz life would sure be boring
if I had no worries about through which holes
in my house you might be pouring.

When Terminix arrived last June
(When I could take no more)
He reassured us that the kind we saw
Were not from cleaning skills poor.

"Oh no," he said, "those kinds of bugs
Come in to get food and water."
(Well, quite frankly, little roach,
I'd rather you didn't bother.)

We dearly love our old house, it's true
But I feel I must confess
That if it comes between charm and new
I'd pick anything over you.

Thank you for reminding me
In all things there's opposition--
But I really wish you'd asked me
If you'd be an imposition.

Now hear me out, you ugly roach,
The charade's gone on too long
You make me want to vomit
And do crimes I know are wrong.

Were it not for Georgia's beauty
And the family we would miss
I would move myself to somewhere
Where you never could exist.

But all in all, I must admit
There are things out there much worse
I'd rather have you than mice or bats
Or with a plague be cursed.