Summer 2016: an overview

Each April and May, I start planning the summer: what I want to accomplish and how I am going to balance fun and flexibility with structure and responsibility for the kids. This was also the first "real" summer with three kids, since last summer Henry was born and I don't really remember much of it through my sleep-deprived state. So that in and of itself was an adjustment.

It's helpful for me to look back and think about what went well and what didn't go so well after a season is over. 

Things that went well:

1. Keeping to the morning routine.

I made these morning routine charts and put them in sheet protectors. It helped us all to remember what we needed to do each morning and to make sure we got the day started off on the right foot.

2. Doing fun activities. As I put other summer blog posts together, I realize that we did do a lot of good things. We went to the library about every week, and I don't feel like the kids got too much screen time. Robbie got 30 minutes each afternoon after quiet time and cleaning up his toys, and Clara got that plus some more screen time at night before bed after Robbie was in bed so I could have some time.

3. Taking a break. I was grateful to have babysitters come over sometimes so I could go to the office to get work done or run errands by myself. That is a luxury, and I was grateful (and felt a little guilty, let's be honest) to have some time to myself occasionally.

4. Camps for Clara. She did three camps--Camp Stillmeadows, an American Girl camp at the Children's Museum, and an Activity Day camp. She loved all of them and wanted to do more.

5. Michael's good balance of work and play. Michael was super busy with work this summer, but he did a great job of taking time to take the kids to the pool and take days off for our little excursions away.

6. Laps around the house. After one of many frustrating days with the kids hitting each other and going to time-out, I had the idea (inspiration) to have them run a lap around the house each time they are unkind to each other. They both have to go take the lap (sometimes two or more), and it helps with resetting the situation. They still go to time-out for other reasons, but it was great because it got them outside, was active, and was easy for me to enforce.

Things that didn't go so well:

1. Goal completion. I had goals for Clara to work on school review or computer typing daily, but that didn't really happen except for a couple of times in June. I also wanted to help her be more physically prepared for middle school PE, but we went to the Montevideo Middle School track only four times, and the one or two laps we only did were hot and full of complaining. I also wanted to have the kids each help me fix dinner a night a week, but that didn't happen except for one or two times in June. Robbie still likes to help me sometimes anyway, but I didn't spend one-on-one time with Clara in the kitchen, sadly. I feel disappointed in myself that I didn't stick to my original goals in that regard.

2. Sibling contention. This was one of the hardest parts of the summer (and is challenging whenever all the kids are home together)--I feel like I'm at a disadvantage because I am the youngest and didn't see a lot of the squabbling between my siblings. Michael tells me it's normal, but that doesn't mean I like it. It was challenging keeping everyone occupied with varying levels of ability, interest, etc. One of the things I am trying to learn is what is in my control and what isn't--I can't control whether they fight or not. I can only control my reaction and attitude. That is so hard for me to accept!

 Here's the bucket list I made--didn't get it all done, but we did a lot of other stuff that wasn't on there, too. I think the bucket list concept is good because it's a visual reminder of things you want to make sure you do, but it's also bad because it can make you feel guilty for not doing something. I learned that I shouldn't put something on the bucket list unless I am actually really excited about it. (Like Michael and I were both not really excited about bowling, for example.)

The only real regret I have is that we didn't stay up late and catch fireflies. By the time I wanted to do it, the fireflies were already gone for the season.

Plan for next summer?:

1. Stick with the morning routine/chore plan.

2. Find more camps/activities for Clara.

3. Somehow find more structure so the kids don't have as much downtime to fight??

4. Have a freezer-meal fiesta before school starts so that I don't have to deal as much with dinner planning, etc.

5.  Make sure I get time with friends as well so I can feel more fulfilled.

6. Decide whether I want to try to have "summer goals" or not.

7. Do a bucket list but include the kids in the planning and do it for an FHE activity.

8. Go to the pool more often--even though I don't love it, the kids do and it's a great active activity.